In an effort to finally fix my daughter’s attempt at cutting her own hair the month before, I got out my scissors the other night to take a stab at it myself. Although I have cut hair many times in the past before for literally everyone in my household including my son, husband, mother-in-law, father-in-law, and brother-in-law (yes, I live with all of them), cutting the delicate wispy bangs of a squirmy two year old girl proved to be much harder than I thought.
Still, I tried. And after bribing her with a dozen gummy treats, nicking her slightly on the forehead twice (only enough to turn red, but not bleed..), and reassuring her over and over again that I was making her beautiful like a princess, I got in maybe a total of about ten little snips, and even that was more than she could handle. On the verge of a tantrum, I finally let her climb down the stool, but before she could run away, I tried to get in a few more snips to even it out. Then before I knew it, I had cut so high that her new bangs were now just barely covering her hairline and totally uneven.
Shoot. What have I done. My face must have shown that something was wrong because she suddenly paused and stared into my eyes, searching for what was the matter. Then, when she finally asked, “what umma? what??” …in her sweet, innocent, naive voice, I felt like I needed to apologize profusely and beg her for forgiveness for doing what I swore to myself that I would never do …give her those horrendous, infamous, awkward looking bangs that I’ve seen so many other mothers inflict upon their young daughters.
But I couldn’t break it to her and tell her that her hair looked like a disaster. So, I quickly gave her the biggest smile I could find and with bubbling excitement yelled, “…you look like a beautiful princess!” Lucky for me, she is still at an age where she believes everything I tell her, so she totally bought it. Her eyes lit up with wonder and smiling from ear to ear with dimples all over her face, she screamed, “Yay! Princess!!!!” She then wrapped her short, pudgy arms tightly around my neck and even proceeded to thank me. Poor child…I deserved no such hug.
This kind of thing happens to me all the time. I make some huge mistake, fail miserably at some task, or walk away feeling like I totally blew it, but when I turn around to see the damage done, I unexpectedly find grace instead. It is like landing the job after a disastrous interview, bowling a strike after the bowling ball slips awkwardly our of your hand, getting an A when you guessed at every single question on the exam, or being able to mend a broken relationship years later when you thought it could never be restored. You expect to get what you deserve, but instead, you get what you don’t and that is grace. From the little things like a child forgiving you for the worst haircut of her life to the bigger things like Jesus dying on the cross for my sins, I have experienced so much grace and experienced it enough times to be able to say there is grace in literally EVERYTHING. And I can honestly say I have no regrets or disappointments in my life because I have seen that if not right away, than in time, all things are not only forgivable, but they are able to be redeemed and even made beautiful in His time.
Since the hair mishap, it has taken a lot of self control not to cringe a little every time I look down at my daughter’s bangs. However, she on the other hand, continues to flash that same smile of delight every time she passes a mirror, and I know she is thinking to herself, “beautiful princess.” And I can’t help but to also smile myself, and thank God for grace because who can deny the beauty that is still all over that precious little face.